At length

Novelist Marko Kloos, shortly after completing the third book in his Frontlines series:

Show me a million-word novel, and I’ll show you a novel in dire need of an editorial disemboweling.

I shuddered at the thought — even Fallout: Equestria, legendary for the distance between the covers of the ultra-rare bound edition, comes in below 700,000 words — and duly hit up Fimfiction to find the longest pony tale of them all.

And here it is: Diaries of a Madman by whatmustido, not yet complete at 120 chapters and 1,663,554 words. The longest single chapter — chapter 34, “Happiness Is Overrated” — is, at 31,992 words, half again as long as anything I’ve ever written, though TwiBrush in aggregate (four stories combined) runs a bit over 60,000.

Faced with a project like this, I am less inclined to suggest “This guy needs an editor” and more inclined to suggest “This guy needs a time machine.”

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